Snap, Crackle, Pope!

okay, so it took over 200 years to elect the first African American President of the United States. what we have now is a man from a minority ethnic group leading a world superpower, a man whom people thought to be an underdog because of his race and creed. The people of America rallied with him and picked him, over an army veteran and P.O.W, whom no one cares about now, and also over a Caucasian woman, whom frankly wasn't picked because of her husband and his loose pants. Obama's victory meant something to this world, showing other countries how a 'coloured' man could be chosen to hold the highest office in the world, showing them how race has become insignificant in these modern times.

now this got me thinking: if moderate America can say they support and back the leadership of a black man, then what about the Vatican? we know that women and gay army veterans can't be priests, let alone hold the office of the Papacy, but isn't it just kinda odd that the Catholic Church has never had a black pope? let's do the math here: America has been around, what, 226 years now? the Catholic Church has been around for 1914 years. hmm. 226 vs. 1914. 226 < 1914.
all white leaders of America till 2008. all white leaders of the Church till - present.

will the world see a black pope after Pope Benedict XVI? can a black man lead the billions of Catholics around the world? is he gonna wear the robes and NOT look a pimp? will he stand at St. Peter's Basilica after his election and yell, "what up peeps?!" more importantly, will he choose his papal name to be 'Sweet Jesus'. then call himself Pope Sweet Jesus I? only god knows.

i say, bring in the minorities! hell, why stop at african american? bring in the hispanics AND the asians! we could have our first Latino pope, Pope Carlos y de la Ricarda Robinho Santa Maria de Florenza y Theresa Conception de la Raúl Rafael Juliá y Arcelay-Guiterrez? or even an east indian pope, who may call himself Adam. to which you have Pope Adam. (say that fast to get the joke.) the native indians, however, seeing as they name anything after the first thing they see, might just name themselves Pope Black Smoke or Pope Lotsa Funny Men in Red Dresses. i don't think that would sound right in Church.

come on Vatican City, elect a minority into the papacy. let the rest of the world know that race has become a thing of the past in the scientific world, as well as the religious. i leave all the Popes over the centuries with this parting statement: if Jesus WAS black, then you're all screwed.